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Regular Features
THE
PARENT COACH
Dr.
Steven Richfield provides articles on many different aspects of raising a child
with ADHD.
ASK
THE ADVOCATE
Each
month we our advocate will be answering questions from our visitors about yours
and your children's rights in the educational system.
PARENTS
TALK
A mother is trying to help her teenage son learn anger management.
MOTIVATION
TIPS
Five great ideas for motivation, including The Shoe Race, Trading Places
and more.
ORGANIZATION
TIPS
Organize your child at home, and maybe find some tips that will help you
as well.
ADHD
IN THE NEWS
Headlines about ADHD, Learning Disability and Mental Disorders
Study on ADD and TV
The recent study published on watching television between the ages of one and
three and the possible link to ADD/ADHD did not take many considerations into
account. The author of the study even admits that he cannot conclude that
television watching and ADD/ADHD are linked.
Read the
Article
Parent To Parent
When teacher's do not follow the IEP or schools are slow to react to the needs of your child, it can be frustrating for you. Parents talk about ways they have worked with the school system to get the most for their children.
The Question:
This question is about my son and his educaiton. I have been asking the public school when the resource room will start. He is in elementary school and in need of additional help in math and reading. He is ADHD and takes concerta, 18mg each morning. He goes to an after school program. I'm trying to set up counseling to help him with his frustrations regarding school.
How can I make the school move faster? I fill that they are giving me the run around. I've called several times. What are my resources? Are there special schools for ADD children? Who pays for their education? Is it affordable?
What Parent's Say:
I am completely new to this whole thing. My daughter was just diagnosed a few weeks ago, and also recommended for an IEP. I talked to my daughter's pediatrician, and she gave me the name of a group that advocates for parents. The group is called PACERS. Parent Advocacy Coalition for Educational Rights. The Pacer Center was created by parents of children and youth with disabilities to help other parents and families facing similar challenges. Pacer is staffed primarily by parents of children of disabilities and works in coalition with 18 disability organizations. I don't have a number, but the web site is www.pacer.org. Give them a try.
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Rights of a Student (minus the legalese)
You are guaranteed:
 | a free and appropriate education |
| in the least restrictive environment |
| that is in the best interest of your child |
| (You, the parent decide what is in the best interest of your child) |
| You can request your child be tested by the Child Study Team |
| You may have an unbiased educational evaluation done for your child |
| (at the expense of the school) |
| You may have an independent psychological evaluation done |
| (at the expense of the school) |
| You can have a independent physical evaluation done |
| (at the expense of the school) |
| You have access to ALL of your child's records. |
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Our daughter struggled so greatly in school that by her junior year in high school she was taking antidepressants. she could not face the hopelessness she felt from going to school. She was killed by a drunk driver 8 weeks before her graduation. we have created a website to help other parents get the information and guidance they need before the spirits of their children are broken. I hope you will visit it. http://www.karasway.org
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The first thing I would recommend is that you take the time to write out all of the questions (concerns, and issues) you have. Ask your child what their worries and concerns are, and then organize them into categories. (i.e. resource room: what activities are done there, and when, my child is doing math the small group near by may be doing something else, what time of the day does my child do that) we found out from my son that it was always hot in the resource room in the afternoon. So we started wearing a T-Shirt under the sweater and in the afternoon take off the sweater. But that was one of the reasons he was having more trouble in the afternoon classes.
The categories may help you define who on the resources team does what. I found by asking the questions in categories the same person is giving me the answers, I jot that persons name by the category.
Next find out who the point person is for all of the resources. We have a scheduled call every Friday with that point person for 5-10 minutes, to see how the week went from both theirs and our perspective and what the next week holds. It allows us to break down the year into bite sized chunks. You will also notice trends faster.
Make sure the IEP is written with concrete and achievable goals, and in plain English. The first couple of years we would get a really long sentence stating nothing more then, we'll see if we can improve. We now say that our goal is: i.e. John can read at the third grade level by xx date. Then we would work backwards to today's date to see if that is possible. If not John will read at the 2nd grade 6 month level by xx date. Then every week I can measure the progress to the goal. You will also be able to determine if the activities are working or not earlier. If not perhaps the goals will have to be reset.
If you don't understand something say "could we go over that again" and rewrite it in your notebook and say, "let me make sure I have this right". The first 2 years I didn't understand what everyone was talking about. We floundered because I wasn't asking questions. Go in to the meeting and establish that "we are on the same team" Parents and teachers. We are all trying to get our son/daughter to maintain self esteem and go as far as we can.
Bring your calendar to the meeting and set the next meeting up before you leave. Have the problem was getting everyone together.
Good Luck.
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As a teacher who has sat on many IEP meetings, I can offer this advice:
Schools have to review IEPs at the designated intervals in the IEP. If you feel a new issue has come up, request a meeting concerning the new issue. The school by law must address your request in a set number of days, and act on the results of their finds in a pre-IEP meeting concerning the new request within 45 days. The results of the new finds are discussed with you in that 45 day period after they have finished their testings, observations, and all that goes with it.
This might seem like a long time, and it is. However, please note that your child is on a list of many students who have learning issues that must be addressed. The school has limited resources to address all children with learning issues at the same time. Calendars are full during the first month of school addressing new cases, as well as with annual and triennial review cases.
Meanwhile, if you feel that there is a new and pressing issue that affects your child's IEP, then by all means write the school principal a notice concerning such. A more immediate meeting will or should be arranged to hear your concerns, and to get the view points of all the people who are currently working with your child so that the concern is clarified more succinctly. Such may or may not alter the already scheduled date of the annual IEP review. However, it is your right as a parent to bring to the forefront any new issue you have noticed with your child.
Write down your concerns in the notice to the principal. Again, have that list of concerns with you at the meeting. Focus on the issues that affect the child at school in the learning process at school. Add the strategies that you are using at home to help the child. Emotional issues are always a concern that affect learning, so be sure to note if there are factors at home that affect the emotional receptivity of the child to learning.
Also, it has been my observation over the years that some of the child's difficulties at school lie in the fact that the child wants to spend more time and activity with the parent, rather than another professional. Consider this as a positive factor, but nevertheless an item to consider. The activity need not be an overly impressive one. It could be just sitting side by side throwing rocks across the grass, or just sitting together talking about nothing in particular. It also includes just passing by the school periodically, and stopping by the classroom just to say HI, or to wave at your child. (don't call the child out of the room, please. Just wave. This is powerful medicine in itself. No chats with the teacher at that time, either.) Also, plan, if it is possible, to have a power lunch with your child monthly. A power lunch is just you and the child, together. Not in the cafeteria where your child has to share you with others. Perhaps the teacher will let you lunch with your child in the classroom. Bring something you put together from home. Avoid the lunches from the fast food places.
You are basically on a picnic with your child. (Why avoid the fast food places lunches? You are setting up an expectation of status symbol lunches so that the child sees that lunch as a status symbol time, not so much as some alone time with you for the duration of the child's lunch period. Fast food it on the weekends.) Remember that the child's lunch time may be an allotment of 25-30 minutes, with recess somewhere in there before or after. However, kids have finished eating in 10 minutes. When it is time for the child to go to recess, that is the end of the session you have with him at that time.
These suggestions may not be helpful to get the school to act faster, but it helps you to spend the wait time more productively. Your child will not feel the abandonment many children feel when they go from school provided support to another, and to another after school, before finally reaching home to the parent. Yes, often IEP meetings tend to revolve in slow motion, but be patient. Do the small stuff with your child. Every little bit helps. Children with ADDADHD issues are also emotional learners. Their learning experiences are deeply tied to how they emotionally experience their world.
You are now the big warm fuzzy. Get some support and parent group coaching for yourself, too. You are not alone.
ZMaleki, MSEd; Teacher
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How can I make the school move faster?
I know when I was a kid the school I was in didn't have the right 'program'. It did take them a while to figure this out. I was stuck in a class for kids that were 'under par'. It was very frustrating being the smart kid in class for 3 years and getting in trouble because of it. Don't rush them too much, they might stick your child in the 'wrong program' just to keep you quiet.
I feel that they are giving me the run around. I've called several times. Schools are a state and federal thing. They are held together with red tape. Be persistent and let them know you are not going away, but don't be a pest about it either.
What are my resources?
There are lots of things you can do. Look in surrounding districts and see if they have programs that suit the needs of your child. The right 'program' was found for me 2 districts away. If your district cannot provide the right program for your child they MUST pay for transportation AND use of the other districts facilities in most cases. These things vary from state to state.
Are there special schools for ADD children?
Yes some public and private schools have programs for ADD kids. My local school district (10 - 20 years ago in IL) paid for public and PRIVATE schools. Private special needs schools are a big business, and cost the district big bucks (I costed them $75 a day plus transportation), they may 'forget' to tell you about them like insurance companies pay doctors to 'forget' about expensive treatment options. KNOW YOUR OPTIONS!!!
Who pays for their education?
If you live on land that is taxed in your district, YOU DO.
Is it affordable?
Depends on where you live and what you make. Note: I know dealing with schools can be a pain. Just do not do what my mother did when I was 8 and lunge over a table to attack the cocky teacher that says your child's disability is your fault (there is one in every school) at your child's IEP meeting! It didn't help her or me and it will not help you!